Bret Boone. A Love Story – 03/14/01

Through unnamed sources (similar to the ones that ESPN uses entirely these days) The Been Stew has been anonymously gifted the unreleased letters between former MLB player Bret Boone and his persuasive siren; PEDs. Their tumultuous tryst will be played out here, exclusively on The Been Stew, through periodic installments. Without further ado, here is the genesis for one of the greatest love stories ever told:

Subject: 4 your @@ only!!!!

Oh man! Seattle is soooooo much nicer than SUCK Diego! I never have to listen to Hell’s Bells ever again. I H8 that song! I hope we don’t play those guys in interleague play. I haven’t even looked at the schedule yet because I just can’t stop thinking about you.

I’m so happy I met you once I moved up to Washington. I was having a lot of trouble getting used to the new surroundings and all the pressure of a new contract. But you’re making it SOOOO much easier. Waking up next to you every morning to my little PEDY Bear gives me that lil extra energy I need.

You should have seen me yesterday. I was totally MASHING the ball. TWO HRS!!!! @;D

There’s a new guy on the team that’s hilarious. He’s got everyone LOLing every day! His name is Suzuki or something. I think he’s from Hawaii or whatevers. You should hear him talk! Yesterday he called it a “burrpen”!!! We’re in FLORIDA! It’s not cold! DOY!

Wellsville, I g2g. See you at my place for dinner!

Bretty Bombs

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