Zenyatta loses perfect record. . . doesn’t care because she’s a horse

Nay

Heads were hanging low Saturday at Churchill Downs as the 6-year old mare Zenyatta ended a prestigious career with her only loss in 20 races.  Hall of Fame jockey, Mike Smith took it especially hard saying, with tears in his eyes, “It was my fault.  She should’ve won.”

In fact of all the people involved in her career, including owners, trainers, jockeys, media, and fans, it seems as though Zenyatta is the only one who doesn’t care about the loss, as you can tell from this Been Stew exclusive interview:

  • BS: Do you think it’s okay for humans to cry over you losing a race?
  • Z: Nay
  • BS: Does it upset you knowing that you were one win away from winning 20 consecutive races and ending your career with a perfect record?
  • Z: Nay
  • BS: Were you even aware that you were in a race and have been racing for years?
  • Z: Nay
  • BS: Do you think your retirement will in any way be affected by global warming?
  • Z: Nay.  The earth has been around for billions of years.  I think it’s impossible to come to that conclusion with only a couple hundred years of data.  Although, I wouldn’t complain about warmer weather.  Anything to avoid having to wear one of those lame horse snuggies.
  • BS: Will you miss being ridden by abnormally short men who constantly whip you?
  • Z: Nay

Well there you have it.  Zenyatta appears to be in good spirits following the only loss of her career.  Mostly because she is a horse and never realized that she ever had a career.



 

BS: Do you think it’s okay for humans to cry over you losing a race?

Z: Nay

 

BS: Does it upset you knowing that you were one win away from winning 20 consecutive races and ending your career with a perfect record?

Z: Nay

 

BS: Were you even aware that you were in a race and have been racing for years?

Z: Nay

 

BS: Do you think your retirement will in any way be affected by global warming?

Z: Nay.  The earth has been around for billions of years.  I think it’s impossible to come to that conclusion with only a couple hundred years of data.  But I wouldn’t complain if it is getting warmer, because then I wouldn’t have to wear one of those gay horse jackets.

 

BS: Will you miss being ridden by abnormally short men who constantly whip you?

Z: Nay

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